As others have noted, Tuesday night’s election results quickly turned into a MAGA disaster for the One-Term-Loser Donald Trump.
In the final run-up to the midterms Trump, acting (as usual) like a brainwashed Fox News viewer who can be convinced that fake news and shitpolls are real, made himself the face of the anticipated “Red Wave,” with a blitz of Save America rallies designed to be a “show of force” ahead of his anticipated 2024 announcement.
Not to be outdone, Elon “Dark MAGA” Musk tried to cement his status as Twitter’s new Trump, by encouraging his 115 million followers to vote for the party of insurrection, racism, pussy grabbing, corporate evil and religious zealotry to help him achieve his own personal goals of crushing unions and destroying trial lawyers.
The Midterms Were a MAGA Disaster
Unfortunately for the soon-to-be-indicted(?) document thief and the world’s richest exploding carmaker, the people of America had different ideas.
In Pennsylvania:
Voters sent snake-oil salesman Mehmet Oz back to New Jersey and told confederate soldier Doug Mastriano, “sorry, wrong century.”
In New Hampshire:
Ultra MAGA election denier and litter box fetishist Don Bolduc—who pollsters told us was surging before Election Day—crashed faster than Dogecoin after an Elon Musk SNL appearance.
In Arizona:
Trump-endorsed anti-choice extremist Blake Masters is trailing Democratic-incumbent Mark Kelly in a Senate race MAGA world was hoping to flip. In a closer race for Governor, Kari Lake still trails Democrat Katie Hobbs.
In Georgia:
Trump-endorsed Russian-roulette aficionado Herschel “Get Well Soon” Walker is running 4 points behind GOP Governor Brian Kemp and trailing Democratic incumbent Raphael Warnock in a race that may be headed to a runoff.
In Michigan:
Democratic Governor Gretchen Whitmer cruised to re-relection against Trump-endorsed, DeVos-funded TV personality Tudor Dixon.
In New York:
Democratic Governor Kathy Hochul saw off Trump-endorsed Congressman Lee Zeldin, whose “lead” in GOP-friendly polls Murdoch media had heavily promoted as part of their psy ops campaign in the campaign’s final days.
In Colorado:
In a race she was expected to win easily, Lauren Boebert wakes up this morning still trailing her Democractic challenger Adam Frisch in CO-3, with 90% of the votes counted.
Meanwhile:
All six insurrectionists running for key Secretary of State positions got defeated.
In 2022, Republicans Won the “Old-Fashioned” Way
While the night was a disaster for Trump, Musk and “Dark MAGA,” the GOP did show they were still able to win the old-fashioned way. With racially biased voter suppression and extreme gerrymandering of the kind that helped Brian Kemp defeat Stacey Abrams (again) and Ron DeSanctimonious build his 2024 credentials by flipping a few House seats in Florida.
DeSantis continues to build his brand as the “more-effective fascist” the GOP may need to fully deliver on the aims of white supremacists and “Christian” Nationalists without all the baggage of being a mentally feeble, relentlessly criminal, and clinically diagnosed psychopath.
What’s next?
After a night in which Republicans underperformed almost everywhere, the best guess is that Democrats hold the Senate and the GOP emerges with a narrow House majority. In other words: Two years of hell, but with some more Biden nominees and judges confirmed.
But at least we now know that—in the post-insurrection, post-Dobbs, post-Classified-documents-theft world—Trump’s brand remains toxic and Elon Musk’s endorsement of the GOP is as worthless as a blue checkmark.
Onward.
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